It's Christmas but why can't I smile?

So Christmas just passed and it was interesting to say the least. I spent time with my family, exchanged gifts, made some jokes. It was a good time. On Christmas day, my cousins and I were trying to win some free prizes of G4tv with no luck.

Now amongst all this, there was one thing that was plaguing my mind. The fact that I don't have a new job yet and January is coming around the corner. With me worrying about this situation, a whole bunch of questions popped in my head:

Am I making the right choice?
What if Everything goes wrong?
You sure you know what your doing?
What if you run out of money?
Are you going to make it to Japan?

Questions like that were in my head one hour before Christmas day. And this state of worry has been stuck in my head ever since. I wouldn't worry as much if I had a new position, or at least more money saved up. I know its the holiday season so I should be hoping for the best for next year. But its like I have this dark cloud over my head that I can't get rid of.

Funny thing is, this same problem is happening to all my roommates. We are all college graduates and we can't seem to get a break.

One of the goals I have is to make a difference in my life. I want to be known for doing something instead of just existing. And the position where I'm at now doesn't seem like I'm making a difference.

If you settle for less, you get less. Never settle, but don't let life pass you by.

With the world revolving around C.R.E.A.M. Nothing is promised until you make that promise.

And right now, I don't know what I promised myself.